At what age would you or did you let your teenager go out on a date? Is it a different age for girls or boys? My daughter is 14 and she thinks I should let her date. She likes a 16 year old. There is NO way I'm letting him pick her up and take her anywhere. Do you think I'm being too overprotective?
I let my daughters date at 14, though only group dates and only when a parent picked up and dropped off. And only with guys their own age or a year older. I was a little easy on them, but I ain't stupid. And they were good kids, they followed my rules and grew into good adults who gave me six grandkids.
IMHO, the age at which a parent allows their child(ren) to date depends on the child. How mature is your Daughter? How responsible is she? How is the communication between the two of you?
My Daughter was extremely mature for her age. She always has been. I did let her "date" when she was 9 years old. I took her and the little boy she liked to the library to study, which is exactly what they did. (I was there watching but from a distance.) There was no kissing or touching, just making those funny "cow eyes" at each other once in a while and giggling.
I allowed her to go out on dates where a parent (usually me) drove and was present the entire time. There were also large group dates to the roller rink. She was a very mature 13.
Since she was very mature, extremely responsible, we had excellent communication, she had total respect for herself, her body, for me, for our home, for others and she knew everything about sex as well as birth control, I let her date when she was 14.
You also have to consider something else. As a parent, you want the best for your child and you want to protect and hold onto them for as long as you can. You do have to begin to open the gate at some point. You also don't EVER want to put your child in any situation where they will be prone to lie to you or disobey you. If she's like most of todays 14 year olds and she really likes this 16 year old boy, chances are she's going to see him behind your back. Boys of 16 are very immature for the most part. I would at least meet him and then decide whether or not I wanted my Daughter to date him. I don't know that I would let him pick her up, though. That would depend, again, on my Daughter, our relationship and the boy. That's a call only you can make because only you know your Daughter.
You also want to remember, when the boys come around and call at all hours, that your Daughter has no control over the actions of others. She can tell them not to call past, say, 7pm, until the cows come home. That doesn't mean they won't call at midnight. She's told them not to so if they do, it really isn't her fault. The same with boys showing up at your door or around your house at all hours.
Good luck! Fasten your seatbelt very tightly because you're in for the ride of your life!
Ialso have a 14 yr old and being a mother who grew up during the sixties I did not allow my older set of kids to date anyone outside the home until they first had "home dates". After having their date come to my home at the age of 15-16 they were allowed to date unsupervised after age 17. By that time I knew enough about their date to feel comfortable with them out of my sight. That also gave myself time to talk to my kids about the dangers and fun of dating and them time to discover and suffer the many ups and downs of dating and socializing, with me there to answer questions and be supportive. Now, with the young kids that I have adopted the age for dating has become younger and younger with each year that goes by . I will stand by my old method that worked rathe than falling for the new method that has grown more "babies by babies", more drug addicted kids and killed more kids, and than the sixties.
obviously it depends on the parent, but I think that HS is the appropriate time to allow your children to begin dating.
Older boys are driven by hormones, so its always dangerous to just let your daughter go out with anyone, so make sure you meet this young man and strike a bit of fear in his heart so he knows what he's getting into if he is a jerk.
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