Discuss IM5688's answer to: Should i stay in their lives or let them go?brittb

After being with my ex for 3 yrs and staying in her sons lives as a good example for over a year past that, I am unsure as to whether or not this is what's best for them or me. I have no legal rights ...

IM5688
IM5688 Answered:

After reading your original question, the answer provided by OronD, and your comment to his answer, I would suggest, (as difficult as it might be for you at times,) to stay in their lives as young and positive role model. Continue to go to their sporting events school socials with the grandmother. Show an interest in their school work and their interests. While you may feel pushed aside by her family at times, the boys will grow up knowing you, loving you, respecting you and feeling comfortable with you. Do not take this away from them. I have a question for you. Since custody was awarded to the grandmother, has any stipulation been made in the event grandma cannot care for them anymore. Depending how long you and your partner were together with the children, may give you some type of next of kin legal rights. Check with a good attorney. I hope my advice was somewhat helpful to you. Please feel free to email me anytime and please keep me posted.

Quote #1. Just remember, if the grass always seems greener on the other side...it's probably because there is more manure there. Quote #2. So often times it happens, that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key. Quote #3. Just remember this my firends, when you look up in the sky, you can see the stars and still not see the light.
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brittany woods
brittany woods Thinks this answer is Helpful:

thank you for your answer. truly it was more so what i was wanting to hear though i was trying  to avoid being biased. i wish that there was an option for next of kin rights but unfortunatly the only way that would happen is if their grandmother decides to list me in her will when it comes to the boys. i am ...odd for lack of better words. i am very young. way too young to have been with their mother. though i have always been very mature for my age...if i was to say i was with her...it would be signing her up for a statutory charge. i was 16 thinking i was awesome for getting with a 29yr old...now im 20 and realize that she was sick for being alright with that age differance.  its the last week of summer here and i have them today and for the rest of the week. going to make this week count. we are getting out of townl to my current girlfriends family ranch. let them be boys without the worries they have when they are home. i am going to do everything i can to stay around for them. as long as theyre with their grandma i know she wont keep them from me...their mom on the other hand...im not so sure but we will cross that bridge when we come to it.  thank you for your support once again.
 
IM5688
IM5688

Dear Brittany,

I am really happy that my answer helped you and I am happy to be supportive to you. Please feel free to contact me anytime and please keep me posted as you and the children progress. Please allow me to offer you a few words of caution: While I understand that you want to make your time with the children special, don't go overboard. Don't make a habit of buying them expensive gifts or always taking them to expensive places. As they grow older, they, (as well as others,) may feel that you are trying to buy their love, and you don't need that. Also, as close and loving to each other as you and te children have become, always be prepared. Someone, someday, may try to wipe them out of your life completely and as much as this will devastate you, you need to be strong enough to get through it and accept it. Hopefully, you will never have to cross this bridge, but always be prepared to do so. Good luck to you always. - Louis
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