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My problum is that my husbands penis is not big ...

my problum is that my husbands penis is not big enough for me...his penis is 4.5" rock hard,he knows it small and has been very good about using dildos and penis exstentions on me wich i love, BUT i have been doing alot of masterbating wile he is at work. i am very sexual and i feel horny at least once a day. i have been masterbating at least 5 or 6 times a week fo the past year or more. in the last few months i have goten into exstream masterbation useing BIG dildos, (not the ones he uses on me) . if we have sex in the morning, just as soon as he leaves i will get up and get my hidden toys out and masterbate for at least an hour. if we have sex at night befor bed ,i lay there afterwords and think "i cant wait till morning till he goes to work". when we have sex it is always good, i usaly orgasum, and we have alot of fun. he enjoys using the toys on me and he knows he can do whatever he wants. when i have sex by myself its "AWSOME" i love filling my holes with the big toys, i fantasize about being taken by forse by 2 men and i orgasum so hard over and over, i love it...i want to break out the BIG toys when we have sex but i dont know how he will take it.. 1st i dont want him to think i am demeaning him because of his small penis, 2nd i dont want him to freek out when he sees my BIG toys, he has been using 2 standerd size dildos (about 7" long-1.5" thick) my 2 faverate toys are (11" long each and 2.25" thick). i dont think i can hide it from him mutch longer because i think he is starting to notice that i am bigger down there, he has comented the last few times saying "wow that sliped right in there". should i interduse my toys to him? should i sudgest some new toys bigger than what he uses and then later get out the BIG boys???? should i just keep doing what i am doing??? he likes doing anal on me and i dont think he can tell as much back there and he knows that i masterbate ( just not with what) so he could think thats the reason for me being losser, what should i do ???? please help!!!!!!!

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Hi, ---------- Very clear: You want the big toys but you don't want to hurt him. The best thing you can do is to tell him that you really enjoy sex with him, it's really great and you reach good orgasms, but you will appreciate if he'll use little bigger toys (Let him buy it). After a while repeat it..... and so on, repeat it until you get the toys in the size you feel best. The key word is: Gradually..... ---------- Best regards,

Love is the battery of life....

this is realy what i wonted to here, do you think it will be ok to keep using the big ones my self?? i sure hope so because i sure do love them!!!!

if it feels good do it....

First of all it sounds like your husband is being a lot more accommodating then most as far as your sex life goes, so, that's a good point for both of you.

The other thing I want to say is that sex is more then penis size and that it's hard for me to believe that your entire sexual pleasure comes from just using a big dildo.

A lot of times in masturbation, when we can focus more on ourselves, we get better orgasms, also, as a woman, I know that for me at least the need to have sex and the need to masturbate are pretty separated. Each of those sexual activities gives me a chance to explore and experience my body in a different way.

I think the problem here is not that you want a bigger dildo but that you feel bad about hiding things from your husband. I do believe that even in marriage we are allowed to keep some things to ourselves, and things that has to do with our fantasy life and body is one of them. I don't think anything is wrong about you going on using the Dildo.

I do however, think that sharing this with your husband might be a cool way for both of you to enjoy, how about letting him watch while to masturbate with the dildo? I think it will probably turn him on and not make him feel bad.


Also, and regardless to the Dildo question, I know that Anal sex is a really great way to enjoy a partner with a smaller cock since the anus is tighter - how about giving that a shot?

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thank you for your reply to my question,,also would like to say i have enjoyed reading some of your others. i fell that my situation may be alittle diferant. my husband of 20 + years and i have a long and deep history with sex. when it comes to sex we have thought about it, tryed it, or done it,  well most of it. we injoy loving sex, fun sex, hard core sex, video tapeing, roll play,fantacy, BDSM, swaping, ect; we just enjoy sex. we have had sex with other people in the past, (not often) he loved watching me do another man, he injoyed it probably more than i did..... (the guy was good looking and very well hung but he sucked at sex). we were always careful and always used protection and we were both presant each time. (well until i just reasently done something when he was not there) one thing i do want to say is just because he has a small penis dosent mean hes not a good lover, he is always up for anything, he knows he is small and he does a great job at compensating for it. he even likes to be teased and humileated about it during sex.......as far as me likeing huge dildos i just love the feeling of  them in both of my holes. it could be some kind of power trip, "just knowing i can handle them". maybe its sycolodgical,"knowing that he is realy small makes me want something realy big". maybe it is just because that i have had so much sex over the years that i just need the big ones. he knows that i like bigger toys to some egstent because the toys he uses on me are 2 times the size of him but my personal ones are 2 times bigger still. i think that most likely he would love to see me take such big toys but there is a BIG deferance between what he uses and what i use. i just dont want him to freek out.the way i see it is that i have 2 choises.........   1- i could put on a show for him and suprise him by showing him what i can do or 2- i could tell him i wanted him to get some bigger dildos and just see what he comes up with then go from there.....i know that many people will read this and think our sexual activity is abnormal  but all i can say is we have been very happly maried for over 20 years,very happy together,truely love each other,we both lead normal productive lifes,work hard,honest,great relationship with our familys, we keep our sex life privet, we dont have any kids (medical prob: when i was 19). we know that many people would not aprove of our sex life. we enjoy sex,we have no reason to change it nor do we wish to. if people want to judge us or look down on us then so be it !!!!once again thanks for your responce, i have enjoyed your other responces to other questions as you have given very good advice....    

if it feels good do it....

I think that it's super cool that the two of you are so open about sexuality, I wish this kind of openness on anybody, me included.

I know in my sexual life there are things that are very easy to talk about and some things that are hard to talk about, obviously, size is not an easy topic, I guess any type of physical criticism is not fun to express or have it expressed to you, especially something to do with intimate parts.

I think that sex is a very emotional thing and it invoke a whole range of feelings - from joy and love, to rage and aggression (not in a bad way), to shame. I think that for me, the strongest sexual fantasies are the one that involve, to a degree, shame - knowing that something is a taboo makes it more attractive.

I think that with the openness you and your husband share, there are very few things that are taboo in your relationship, which is, as I said, really great. But that if you feel a need to explore the next taboo, with or without your husband, then that's also pretty amazing and whether you choose to share this or not - it's so cool when people reach into their inner sexual self and what they find in there.

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i agree, i exsperance some shame in a differant way, i sometimes have some shame because of what i am doing when i masterbate with my toys only because he does not know about it.i quickly get past this because i am quite sure he would have no prob: with me masterbating on my own. i love having sex with him but for some reason when i have sex with my self and my fantacy i get completely consumed with it and i have the most intence Os and just flud my self. i use to have many differant fantacys but for the past few months i have been totaly into fantasizing about being taken by force by 2 studs with huge packages, even if i start fantasizing about something elce i always end up fantasizing about these 2 studs rapeing me, makeing me do all types of things.i think about them punishing me, it is a feeling that i just have to have,its totaly bliss. its funny though when i have sex with my husband i never find myself thinking about it. i just get totaly into what ever we are doing. i have been masterbating more and more lately and realy enjoying it. i am allways ready to have sex with my husband when ever he wants but i truely enjoy sex with myself....

if it feels good do it....

Hi sandra.been reading some of your items me and my wife 23 years kinda same things but she don't want to with anyone else. The problem with her going bigger& bigger (Im not small )is its gotten tad bit bigger down there and her feeling seems to have deminished or now take much much longer to reach her peak ( I hope Im dong it for her Im not a min man or anything I like to stay and play), sex for use is like a excape from the real world were nothing else matters but us and our desires but she has been noticing a differance  in her sensitivity.Everybody is differance but sometime bigger is'nt always better.sometimes there can be consequences for a action. It is good to see you two are open about things it  make for a stronger relaction.  

It is perfectly normal for you to desire larger and larger, because in sex we always want what we do not have or something we feel is taboo. Explore Explore, get bigger and bigger untill you have taken the biggesst you can handle in both holes, It is not and will not hurt anyone it is all about pleasure and your hubby will understand that, I have the opposite problem with my gf, I feel like I am hurting her because I am to big and thick. any answers?

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