psychology

.For the past 2 yrs iam leading a stressfull life ...

.For the past 2 yrs iam leading a stressfull life . we had a family friends both husband and wife known to us for the past 15 yrs. We all like one. 5yrs back their family life shattered bcoz of his wife?s attitude the wife stopped talking with us but the r/ship with her husband continued as a normal good friend. 2 yrs bak he holded my hands and told me that he needs me as a good friend for life time and said that no one in his life all left him including his wife( bocz their intercaste marriage) also I know all the truth. And we started our relationship a very sacraed way as a good friends. Sharing all goods and bads and my husband knows that we are very good friends. Once we bcame prey to the natures hunger.and we commited a mistake. From that time we felt very guilty he stopped coming to our house and me I could?nt be normal with my husbdand whom I love too much for the past 14 yrs. At the same time I cannot give up my friendship and I cannot forget him . but I tried to stop talking to him for one month at the same time iam excepting him to call me if he is not calling iam chasing him and calling him and I use abuse him and sometime beat or bite him ina rude manner. I don?t know why iam behaving life this but inner mind is saying he cheating me and gone back with his wife, But he says he still need me as a good friend and he loves me too much . But he is still staying with his wife and going out happily with their family. But I cannot be happy like him some sort of guilt is pinching me and my heart. Some times I want to die and go that extreme and Iam stopping thinking of my kids. Please guide me to come out of this trauma. My problem when ever I feel that he is moving around with his wife . I call him over the phone and abuse him and personally go and beat him till he bleeds. But he keeps quite. Is he cheating me. I know my mistake but I do not know what to do. I am stop thinking about him only in my deep sleep. Please help if I could continue my life smoothly.

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Answers

dr.thomas Answered:

Dear Friend,

You are a human being. Yes, you are a wife. More than that you are a mother. Mistakes in life are common. It is not fair to repeat the same mistake. That is what you are thinking of. As you as simply the nature's call, was not fair. Ask to yourself,

1. Are you really a good wife?

2. Are you really a good mother?

As I said mistakes are human nature. But repeating the same mistake is cheating. So, completely avoid the relation with that "friend"( He is not a good friend, he is also cheating himself and his family too.He is too clever and cheating you.)

And now,

Think about your family, your husband, your children. There will not be another wife to your husband, but you. There will not be another mother to your children , but you. So you are a VERY IMPORTANT PERSON to your family. With out you your hsband and children can not live. You are the backbone of your family. So always think about you and your family. Other so-called friends are pretending figures.

Try to practice YOGA for realaxation. It will do a lot to your life. Good luck.

Have a nice time!