I just turned 16, and I have found that I have grown colder towards others. I avoid going out with friends, and i tell boys I'm a lesbian so they won't ask me out. I used to enjoy being around people, but now I am a complete hermit. I don't feel empathy for others. Usually, when people are in pain or at a disadvantage, I feel angry or annoyed. I don't like talking to people, I can't make eye contact, and when I try to talk I have a hard time making the words make sense to others. I don't like being touched and I don't liek answering questions. I am easily annoyed with people and I have daydreams about homicide and suicide. Why do I feel like this and what can I do about it?
It's very good that you see the problems you are having; and very good you came here, reaching out for help. Many people don't see or try to get help for such problems and that allows them to get worse.
You need to go see a psychologist or psychiatrist for help with those problems. They can talk to you and try to figure out what is causing this for you and then they can help you see how to try and get it straightened out. A psychiatrist can prescribe medications if needed to help you (a psychologist can not prescribe medication, but they can help you with cognitive therapy ... talking to you to help you understand what it going on and how to deal with it.
Please go get counseling very soon; that will be your "First Step" toward recovery and wellness.
What you are describing sounds like a classic case of depression. Depression is treatable but sometimes very serious illness. As far as what to do about it, you must consider how long you had this problem and what may have caused it. Either way, you need to tell an adult whom you can trust that you feeling this way. A teacher, your guidance counselor, or your family doctor maybe good choices if you don’t feel you can talk with your parents. If the first person you tell isn’t helpful, then go to another person. Don’t stop until you find someone who is both empathetic and will see to it that you get the medical help. There is help out there, you don’t have to feel this way.
Are you very spiritual? I see your symbol is the eye of Ra. It seems the closer I get to God the less I like People because I see things I didn't see before and I want to protect myself from their negative energy.
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