How do I deal with my son's grandmother? My son is a toddler. His father (I'll call him Bill) and I live together but we are not a couple right now (I am not sure if his mother knows that, or not ...
Your boyfriend will never be able to "back you" on this. If he can't face his mom -- only you can do this.
you can ALWAYS take the high road though!
You can call Shirley and say "It was so nice of you to invite my son on this outing that sounds absolutely wonderful, however I have already made plans for my son and I while Bill is at work." You can also go along the lines as
"I understand you want to spend time with my son, but I would feel more comfortable as his mother being there with him. I'm sure you understand since you are also a mom."
See.. tell her off in a politcal way :)
You don't have to have Bill stand up for yo - because obviously he won't ... so you yourself have to take the HIGH road.. don't get mean and nasty because that will just cause dissension between you and bill. you always want to make sure you can HONESTLY say..."i'm being as nice and polite to her as I possibly can.."..
Makes you look better in the end, while she may come off as a hariden.