I have problem with my marriage life which is about breaking up. I need some consult er to advise me what i should do???
Which one of you wants to break up?
How many years together?
Is one an alcoholic or drug addict?
Are there health problems?
Children? How many? what ages?
Age of each one of you in the marriage.
Finances? Are each of you able to live on your own?
actually the problem I think so deep. I am 30 and he is 37 years old.we are with together for 10 years from college. 5 years ago we got married we don't have any children. our life style was different. always because of our professional life we were separate , not such a usual couple. we used to love each other so much. till we shifted to Italy to continue our studies in PhD. one year we did live separately in two different city. In this period, i think he was in contact with so many girls and after a time , i was also busy with my professional life, I realized he is getting so far from me.... we couldn't understand no longer each other like past. we didn't have intention to be with together. we had always argue almost from my side because I could feel he is in touch with others.I Suffer a lot even I am getting depressed but he doesn't mind . we decided to try living for 3-5 month without each other to realize how much we have love for each other. now he shifted in my city but agian living separetly. he doesn't want to live in the same place with me. one day i have argument with him about our problem and I became mad. I was crying so much but he left me to his home. after a couple of hours I went there but I saw he is on the phone with other lady..... HE TOLD ME IT IS NOTHING JUST TO keep himself happy and busy he wants to speak with other ladies, also not one lady.....I couldn't believe him.... I left him that time. I decided to not be with him at all.. but after two-three days again I thougth I can fix and forgive him..... but this time he told he doesn't want to live with me.....and break up....he saw me so unhappy, crying and emotionally hurt..... then after one week he came and told : freeze this topic for a while to decide better.... now I am confused . from one side I wasted 10 years of my life and I was in love with him, even now I have love for him but when I visit him, I remeber all his ....
now I want to decide completely to not bother myself and he. please guide me what is wrong?
Love needs to be fed. If you live far from each other and are too busy to care for each other, this is risky... especially if there are other factors, like you both changing, life pressures, and so on.
I like this principle in the Bible: "Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent...". I believe that each of you needs to think on their own of the whole thing and point out what wrong they personally did- not much of "s/he's been wrong in doing so and so".
You both need to talk to a marriage counselor.
Good luck Marya :)
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