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It's a man thing

Why is it supposed to be okay if a man looks at magazines and webites that are full of naked women. My boyfriend says it is because Men are visual and they can't help themselves.  He says it has nothing to do with his feelings or the way I look.  But I beg to differ. He is not addicted or anything like that.  But him knowing I hate it doesn't stop him.  When do I need to be concerened?????  I am not a prudy person at all. If he loves me so much , why does he do this?????  The internet has some really raunchy stuff on it.

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I think that it's OK for guys to look at a Maxim or something if they like to get their peeks in and read guy sort of articles.  However, obviously looking at porn seems like of rude.  You could just talk to him.  Let him know that you feel like it's sort of a waste of time, in the same way that you think maybe sitting and playing video games is a waste of time.  If he wants to glance while pooping or something, then whatever.  But, it shouldn't be so obvious to you that he enjoys looking at other women.  That wouldn't make any girl feel good. 

A foolish heart will call on you to toss your dreams away, then turn around and blame you for the way you went astray. - Grateful Dead, Foolish Heart

I agree with deadhead. It's true that guys are very visual and sometimes we just need some visual stimulation. However, if you have a beautiful girl, whom you are in love with, by your side then you should not need to look elsewhere. I can understand looking if your girlfriend is not around, but clearly your boyfriend is not being sensitive to your feelings and you need to talk to him about it. If a girl asked me to stop looking through magazines I would probably try to defend myself at first as well, but would always respect her needs. I have to say however, that it is usually true that our infatuation with magazines and porn is not related to our relationships. It is almost always seperate and does not mean that we are missing anything from our actual sexual relationships.

Hi,


I think a bit differently:  It all depends on the quantity and how much it effects him.  If he spends too much time (say 1-2 hours a day) that's a problem.... If he looks 5-10 minutes.... that's a differnt story..... If it's just for some fun and doesnt effect him (his sex with you) than I would recommend that you tolerate it (and, in parrallel, discuss it with him and tell him it bothers you, it might effect your relations, and you would appreciate if he stops). 
Best regard,
Love is the battery of life....

It is in the mind of the people who look at the problem-net is open to all and anybody can see the contrentsthe main reason-i presume is -in a man the sex is visible-because the wife can see the erection in him-but in the case of the wife a man cannot know the depth of her passions-for which he uses the net contents as a stimulator-so that he can do his best to the wife sexually.

I think women tend to look at love and sex as the same thing.  Men do not.  Just because a man looks does not mean that he does not love you.  Although it may be a little rude,   this is why couples should get to know each other before they commit.  Not all men like to look at porn and not all women mind, in fact some do it themselves.  So knowing what kind of things your boyfriend likes is important.  Find out how important it is to him and how important it is to you that he doesn't do this.  If this is not resolved at this time it will be a factor in your future relationship.

Hey,  it is just the same old double standard thing. Some males think that "looking" is OK for men, but if their lady starts looking at pix of nude men, espc. if they have an erection - well, THAT'S a different story! If you want to get your point across, just stare at every hot  guy you see whenever you are out with him. Or better yet, find some butt-naked pix of men and drool over them when he's around. I'm not saying you need to start looking at porn - but rather art or erotica that includes well hung guys - and only when you are 

in his presence. I guarantee that when the shoe is on the other foot he'll get mighty uncomfortable & maybe even begin to respect your point of view and change his own selfish, insensitive habits. But if he still "can't help himself" and what he is doing bothers you more and more, that's a red flag. Most likely, as time goes on, his behavior will turn you off completely.


It's a guy thing, (i am in fact a guy) but no worries, it's not you(to be truthful it's like an irresistable temtation).

Detective:The persone who stole it went this way assistant:no du sherlock holmes detective:how do you know? assistant:he's right there eating it

Hi, I'm so tired of "It's a guy thing".  Viewing porn as a single man is as far I would go to say it's ok.  When a man walks into a relationship he should not need porn, it's an insult.  If porn has nothing to do with the "girlfriend" or "wife" then why is it needed?  The visual is sexual stimulant and you should be all he needs.  If he doesn't stop then maybe he is addicted.  And don't let him make you feel guilty for the way you feel.  I'm divorced after 23 years of porn, lies and drinking.  I didn't know about the lies and porn for 15 of those years and it was rough and I've heard all the excuses.  If you don't like it and he won't stop you will be very unhappy.  You need to have trust and respect and a partner who doesn't ignore your feelings.

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