Discuss LauraD41's answer to: Can I help my son come to terms with the new baby?

I am pregnant with my second child. My son is 13. His father and I are divorced; it was a bad marriage and my son was rejected by his father. Since the divorce, his father fades in and out of his ...

I agree with Helen-what this kid needs is a sense of absolute security in his mom's unconditional love. Maybe you dont need to dwell so much on "preparing" him or trying to get him excited about his new sibling. Probably it would be better to let him see that the pregnancy and the new baby are not the entire focus of your attention, that you will always continue to be his mom no matter what. He needs to feel that you love him absolutely, and allow him to have whatever reaction he feels like in his attitude towards the pregnancy. It is highly unlikely that he will NOT be fascinated by the baby once it arrives, just let him set his own pace in establishing the relationship HE wants. He is after all 13, not 3, and I agree with many of the other contributors when they say he doesnt want to THINK about Mom being (gasp) pregnant, let alone TALK about it!  Just love him, be attentive to him without constantly discussing the baby, and relax. I'm sure your husband is a good guy, but maybe he needs to be encouraged to nurture a relationship with your son for his own sake, not just limited to "trying to get him excited about and involved with" the baby. Good luck and God bless.

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