I am a 23 year old well read, intelligent, college ...

Hi Paul,
The best advise I can give you is: Find someone you trust and ask him to help and guide you.   You need desparately someone that will "show you the way". 
Best regards,

I'd suggest you start by knocking off the pot smoking.

Then I suggest you figure out what makes you happy and start doing it. That's because in order for you to attract a girlfriend, you must first love yourself.

Loving and respecting yourself starts with who you are on the inside, not what you look like on the outside or how much you have (or don't have).

What are you good at? What do you like to do? Can you share those things with others somehow?

Meanwhile, you seem to be having a bit of a pity party - which is fine - but if it gets worse, or if it causes you to act in a manner which negatively affects your life, then a few sessions with a qualified mental health therapist might help. Keep in mind that seeing a therapist doesn't mean you're crazy; it just means that you may need the help of an impartial third party to help you get back on track.

And as far as meeting girls and/or losing your virginity goes; don't worry about the timing. Things will happen as your life unfolds - your job is to give yourself the opportunity to unfold.

Take a just-for-fun class through the local community college or park & recreation district. Volunteer with an organization you believe in. Find a hobby or join a club so you can meet others with similar interests.

Life is full of opportunities - but you won't find them unless you take the time to open some doors.

Good luck.

my friend,u r simply,young,Young,(young)23.u have your whole life ahead of u,belive or not,im a prffesional couciller,unfortunatly,the carrer found me.i didnt find it,ive worked as a pyhc,couc,all my life,as well as individule,personal,of course law enforcment found me to,but im your run of the lii type guy,im simply 43,&all on the job training,of course colledge,but not so much,as on the job,your 23 my man,your a young man,you in a just rough time,as a person,unfortuantly life is tough.but u have to look at the big picture,with that in mind.its not so,much what is going on today,as what u will want to be doing,set short small,simple,key wourd,not complicate your life.simple,easy goal.look at each day as u servived,the weed,my man,in a downer,unfort.smoking weed ifthat was your thought,will keep u down,until,u get out of this pater drop that drug-your young so u might not know?there were t.v.commercials,made,drugs7your brain,unfort,its true,until u eastablished&some what happy.they bring your depreesssion down.but the girl part,my friend,i know 2 u its important,but  relalistic,its not.get involved in different places where the oposite sex is,a friend is nice starter.but u have 2 look &think the part 1st,the bills.this is life,like my typing,LOL:)dont worry about a woman,when u last exspect it will happen,friend 1st as always,u want a real decent woman,not 1 that just lays down,the money,its all ahrd,be happy to feed yourself,take a shower,watch t.v,have a roof over your head,i have a disabily myself,i hurt myddelf,rather sevearly on the job,10 yrs agoe,its a fight everyday..the only 1 who took me out of it,was of course the lord,prayer always helps,there is a god,bont feed onto the b/s.we were not just created,7were tested each &every day,but everday,just keep the rat race out of your life.concentrate on simple,i know this is tough,it all is,yes,if u have benfits,or have access to counciling,taake ever advantadge of this,gift,u dont have to like them,be picky till your comfortable,thewn goels/but get riid of the braine frier-druggs atleast till, your emoyional healthy,i wish u well i pray for u,as this helps,u gotta belive only the very rich can tease themselfs&say,scincetaligy,dont fall 4 it,keep it simple..