Discuss SylviaIEM's answer to: Should i file for a annullment

You say you have been married two months but have been with him 18 years. Are you and have you been a stay at home wife and mother, or just wife? Have you been working and have work skills that would enable you to get a job? How old are you?

  This is my opinion, If you have been a stay at home wife and/or mother all these years just exactly do you intend to provide for yourself? He will eventually find someone else and when he does, you are history. Has he always been self absorbed or is this something new after the heart attack? I can only tell you from my experience. I was married for 19 years. They were not easy years. I would have stayed forever if it had just been me, but I had three children along with myself who were not surviving. He had the career and I had skills as a mother and a wife, not very bankable. All therapist will tell you you need to save yourself, well honey, what they don't tell you is that when he finds someone if not before, the buck will stop with you. You will be responsible for everything. If the hot water heater goes out, what are you going to do? What about health insurance, car insurance, house taxes and insurance? I could have stayed married to my ex. forever, even though he mentally had already left our marriage, I could easily had an affair or two and he would have never known and I still would have had access to the money. All he really cared about by that point was that whenever he got home that I had a smile on my face and the children were taken care of and he didn't have to be bothered with them.  Also, I don't believe anyone should get married unless they are determined to keep their marriage vows.  People who are not Christians, well I don't know why they get married at all except for joint tax deductions.  I did have a brief affair which turned into a 16 year closest and dearest friendship. He died suddenly in 2006. I miss him so much, but I am thankful for the time we had together. He loved me unconditionally. I never knew what that was like until after a time of knowing him. I raised our youngest and surprise son basically by myself. He graduated with all honors from High School, University in two majors, all honors, and from Law School top honors and 2nd in his class. All of our children love their dad, but because of the problems toward the end of our marriage, while we were still living together, it deeply hurt our two oldest children. Our youngest was 9 yrs. old when I moved out. If you are a Christian seek God to help you and to restore your marriage. I had a housekeeper who used to tell me, Miss        , I know women who would crawl through a field of poo(s__t) to be married to your husband and have what you do. I have to say, I did have it really good. I grew up poor, and together we made it till he became extremely successful.  I have often thought about what she said, and now fully understand it.