I have developed a fetish for being taken advantage of

Greetings Nicole:  You've asked and answered your own question.  Yes, I believe you do need psychiatric help. 

I would recommend discussing this with a professional ASAP!  Not only for wanted rape (which you called sexually taken advantage of), but for the anger displayed afterwards toward your friend.  Anger placed at him whilst you knew the action being taken, and pretended not to.

In the above situation, you've deceived everyone, including yourself.  As for your friend, anyone who would do what he did (while thinking you are unconscious) is not a friend, he is a rapist.

Best wishes and be well.

Arrivederci - TWM

TWM , Thumb Up !

 Nicole ,  HE IS NOT YOUR FRIEND HE RAPED YOU AND SHOULD BE REPORTED TO THE POLICE .  Seek some professional counseling and choose your friends wiser .  This is dangerous behavior  ... STD perhaps one that could kill you .

yes you do need help. learn to love yourself, that happens when you decide to grow up.

Nichole, I somewhat have a little bit different input on this subject.  I can understand the imput you received from the others, but I also understand how sexual fetishes can be confusing.  The fact that this person was supposed to be your friend.... yeah, not so good on their part, but then you have to consider what type of friend they are.  Not knowing the circumstances, others may think badly of that friend.  If you guys have a very friendly relationship in which you flirt around a great deal, they may have thought the relationship was open like that.  The issue with you and whether you need to seek professional help.... not necessarily.  Many people have these feelings.  The thought of someone finding you that attractive can be very alluring and sexually arousing.  It's not as if you placed yourself in a dark secluded alley just waiting for a predator. You chose the situation and used it to fulfill your fantasy. The only thing that would make it a little bit more acceptable was if you were to be honest with your friend. You can still make a game out of it while making them aware that you are desiring that sort of thing.  The fact that you allowed him to go all the way before you said anything tells me that either you most lkely like this friend more than a friend, or you felt safe enough with them to allow them to be part of your fantasy. The fact that you yelled at your friend is not a good thing though. It kind of puts them in an awkward situation if they felt as if you were making yourself available to them, then you make them think you didn't want it. That part is a bit twisted, but if this was your first time trying to live out a fantasy, I might encourage you to act a bit differently about it afterwards next time, if there is a next time.

Wisest mom, what I get from Nichole's scenario is that there may have been some deceit in the situation, on Nichole's part.  If she did not want it to happen, she should have said something about it at the get go. We do not know what took place just before the sexual encounter.  She indicated that she"played drunk and passed out", but we do not know whether she initiated any such advances towards her friend prior to the sex.  She very well have acted drunk to excuse coming onto him just incase he pushed her away so that later she would not have to explain to him why she came on to him. I also took into consideration that she stated that she yelled at him after the sex took place, and did not state that she was upset with him, but rather insinuated that she felt badly for yelling at him, which leads me to believe that she wanted something to happen between them.  I do not disagree that it looks badly against the friend for having sex with her while she was passed out, but as I said, we don't know just how passed out she pretended to be. Ultimately, only Nichole knows the situation and whether or not is was rape.  She did not ask if we thought she was raped or not, she merely asked if she needed help for her fetish.