Posted by SisterInNeed 3 years ago In:

brother problems

Brother problems

I need advice about a situation with my brother. I recently bought a house and at the same time my brother was wanting to move back to town. He is a decorator and has great taste about how I can improve my house I want to sell in a few years. We talked on the phone several times about the house and things to improve it including painting and buying furniture. I told him he could stay at the house until he decides what to do with his life. I thought it was a great plan as he could stay for free and help me do the house. After painting two rooms and doing a great job, he tells me I need to pay him for the painting at $400. I was floored because I thought we were family helping family. He has not paid for a thing in the 6 weeks he has been at the house not even food when we go out as a family. I feel I should not have to pay him anything. Our Dad thinks i should pay him something. I want him to finish the house because he can make a big difference. I feel used but know he is doing a great job even though it is taking a lot of time. He has done several other things but not enough to pay for his food and board. What is the right thing to do to keep the peace but not feel like I am being taking advantage of? I need help, please.

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3 Answers

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jkgrandma Answered:

Okay, my first thought is that the two of you need to separate your business arrangements from your family business.

So, if he has the financial resources, then your brother should offer to pay for all or part of his food and other living expenses. Offering to pay when you all go out would also be a nice gesture.

Meanwhile, this is not "family helping family." You are not intending to stay in this house; you do not want your brother to help you decorate because it will make your home a wonderful place to live and relax.

You want his expertise because it will benefit your bottom line when you sell.

That means it is a business arrangement and you should pay for his services.

If he chooses to give you a discounted rate because you are family, then that is "family helping family."

And in return, your brother will be able to pay his cost of living expenses because of the income he is earning.

Everybody wins.

Posted 3 years ago
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SisterInNeed Answered:

Right now it doesn't appear he has the money to pay me.

Posted 3 years ago

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jkgrandma Answered:

You state that your brother is a decorator. I presume you mean that is his chosen profession.

Since you are having him decorate the house you purchased (which you then intend to sell at a profit), then you have, in effect, hired him to do the job.

That means you should pay him for his services.

If you wish to broach the subject of a discounted rate due to the living circumstances, then that is appropriate and your brother should be willing to accommodate your request.

If you pay him the going rate, then he can pay his living expenses in turn.