Posted by Donna Grey 2 years ago In:

,

Donna Grey
Donna Grey Asked:

Should I give my boyfriend a taste of his own medicine?

So my boyfriend has a handful of playboy magazines in his bathroom (all really, really old) and a few in his closet on top of his dresser. We have been together for almost a year now and I'm going to move into his apartment this month. I look at porn, he looks at porn, whatever...BUT we tend to keep it private. I was always a little annoyed that he had playboys in his bathroom for all to see but I never told him to move them. He assures me that he has had them forever, and he only looks at them once in a blue moon. Ok fine whatever. Now that I'm moving in I want them in a private place...I have friends that would need to use that bathroom too. 

Now the reason for my question:

The other day I asked him if he could clear some space for my stuff in his closet. He happily did this and he made considerable room for me, including cleaning the entire closet and putting away all his stuff. However, he left his playboys in the exact same spot on his dresser. Literally...the exact same spot...it's like he hasn't touched them in months. He moved EVERYTHING off the dresser BUT his playboys! LOL! I laughed it off but it has started to bother me. That will be my closet too and I would prefer not to be reminded of the super attractive, big boob blond and her super attractive, big boob brunette friend every day.

So my question is should I make a semi-funny move and bring my playgirls and a few of my hot, muscular, male magazines over; should I put a stack in his bathroom next to his and a few in his closet for him to see every day? I want to gauge his reaction and see if he gets my point…I would eventually remove my playgirls and ask him to remove his playboys. What do you think? Bad move? I don't have a porn star body and NEITHER does he...I want him to feel like I feel when I see his playboys.

Or should I just come out and say…”Listen; please put away your playboys. I live here too.”

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Elden
Elden Answered:

Do you really have Playgirl? If you do then put them out. If you don't and need to purchase them then it would be better to just say Please, put them away. You are trying to act cool with the Playboys, you don't like them for the reasons you said, but if a man can only look at his wife and she isn't trying to make it better then let him look at magazines. He isn't going to run off and find her because he knows that's fake. How ever if you can enjoy the male body then you have as much right to look as he does, just teach him how grownups handle them.

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Bonestructure
Bonestructure Answered:

You haven't asked him to get rid of the Playboys, so in my mind, he's being inconsiderate. It's not that big a deal to move the magazines into the closet. But no, I don't think you should go for payback.

If a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, then that makes me a burning truck filled with TNT hurtling through a rocket fuel depot.
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Equus
Equus Answered:

 


In my opinion for you to purchase and or display Playgirl magazine and the likes is playing games and immature . There is not room for games and the get even in a loving relationship . You haven't ask him to remove the magazines .. so do so . If he doesn't then he is not considering your feelings and that is a red flag in the relationship . His pornography collection is something you knew about and actually by not addressing it then as well as your own use of it he now thinks it is acceptable . You state that you both use pornography . However I sense in your question that this is more than you wanting them kept in a private place . And I quote you " I want him to feel like I feel when I see his playboys." I think you feel disrespected and I agree . I don't tolerate pornography in any form . It is used for sexual gratification and in doing so the user removes himself or herself from the commitment they have made to their partner . This is emotional infidelity and it erodes the relationship and the bond of trust . Communication and respect are two of the foundations to a loving healthy relationship . I feel your relationship lacks both of these . Be honest about your feelings with your boyfriend don't play games . I wish you both the best .

 

 

S.N.O.T.S. Snotsworth's fair lady snots'quus .... Wild & free protect the mustang !........ Bear down chicago bears!!......Hail purdue go boilers !..... Want a sure thing for your money . Lay it down to a thoroughbred rescue . Bet on life after racing !
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