Kathy from Oklahoma City

I am 54 years old and I have been married to a wonderful loving man for 20 years. We dated for 11 years prior to marriage and I am thankful for it. We have no children, but we have 5 Poodles. I take care of my 79 year old Father who has lived with us for the past 6 years. He has severe Dementia and requires all my time and attention. His condition has gotten pretty bad the past few months and I am needing help with is care. My husband is currently in Kansas City working for General Motors until he is eligible for retirement which should be about 2 maybe 3 more months. I sell on ebay so I can help make ends meet.

I have a chronic pain condition known as Reflex Dystrophy Syndrome. It is a nerve pain condition that makes the affected area feel like someone is putting a blow torch directly on my shoulder and arm. I have to take large doses of pain medication just to be able to function each day. I also had to have back surgery and have metal rods implanted into my spine. These two conditions makes it very difficult to take care of my Father when he won't help me and I am trying to get him dressed or his diaper changed. I promised my Father that I wouldn't put him in a nursing home, and I plan on keeping that promise. This past Christmas I had to hire a lady to come in from 11pm until 7am so I could sleep. My father wouldn't stay in bed at night and I wasn't able to get any sleep. I got horribly sick and couldn't get well. After being so ill for several months, I finally hired a Friend that wasn't working to come over and take care of Dad at night-time. It was the best thing I could have done for my own health. With proper sleep, I was able to finally get healthy. This made my job of taking care of Dad a lot easier.

I am hoping there is some kind of agency or group that offers assistance to people who take care of elderly and ill Parents. My father doesn't have enough money to pay for extra help, and I really need someone to come to the house to watch him while I pick up groceries, prescriptions, go to the post office, etc. Dad had gotten really frail and unable to walk much. I use to, and still take him with me everywhere I go, but he won't be able to go with me much longer, he just doesn't have the stamina to handle the daily tasks I need to preform.